My Blade, Your Back by KM Moronova

Here is a summary with spoilers for My Blade, Your Back by KM Moronova

In a prologue, a man finds out that the girl has memory loss. He’s upset because this was not part of the plan; the plan was to get the pills from Cameron, since they are under such strict lock and key. He promises to do what he must to get the girl and Cameron so he can have the pills.

It has been one month since Emery Maves woke up. During that month, no memories have come back—neither her old life nor her experiences in the trials. Her comrades, and others, have had to tell her why she is even there in an elite force, and that she is trying to work her way out. Meanwhile, Cameron is devastated and blames the memory loss on himself. He has been trying to let Emery figure things out herself, but he still wants to be right next to her, though she seems to be wary of him. Emery keeps wondering, though, why she is drawn to Cameron, and no one will tell her what their relationship was like before her memory loss.

Emery, Cameron, and their team get a new mission: to take a specialist into a high-profile building to get a flash drive. Emery and Cameron are the first through the doors, and they all know it will most likely be a suicide mission. Their commander is also looking for others to take the black pill, the one that Cameron relies on to not feel pain. Emery decides she has nothing left to lose and volunteers, which makes Cameron upset. Emery starts to have side effects pretty quickly: bloody noses, darker blood, and nightmares. Some of those nightmares turn good and make her think about Cameron.

Their first mission is a success, and the team is well on their way to gaining their freedom, which is the whole reason they are part of the task force. Though they still have some team bonding to do. On one of their off days, Emery gets attacked, and luckily Cameron is right there to help her out, which just draws Emery more to him. She continues to have questions about him and is more pushy toward Cameron to get those answers.

Their next mission also puts Emery and Cameron on the front lines, though this time Emery gets taken. It seems to be a man that knows her, but she can’t remember who it is. He throws a bag over her head and takes her away. On the journey to their next place, Emery realizes she was hit multiple times during the mission, but thanks to the pills can’t feel a thing. She ends up passing out and wakes up much later. She finds that she was taken by her father and a childhood friend, Reed. Though her father doesn’t much care for Emery, he is just happy to have her in his hands so he can get access to the black pill. Her father treats her unfairly while she is there, including torturing her. Things get better for her when she finds out that Cameron was also taken, and they are put in a room together. The time there gets so bad that Emery ends up getting tortured, and while terrible for her, it does bring most of her memories back, including those of Cameron; she remembers everything about him.

While being held as prisoners, Reed plays both sides. At one point, he and Emery go snooping, and they overhear that the “free cards” they are supposed to get when their task force completes the missions are not actually real. If they succeed, they will be shot and killed. With that new knowledge, Reed helps Emery and Cameron escape, and they find their way back to their old team to complete their last mission. At this point, the pills are having lots of side effects for Emery, and Cameron is able to help her through it, now that they both fully trust each other.

Back at base, this time with Reed, their mission needs a lot of prepping, including HALO jumping. Emery’s nightmares turn into hallucinations, and Cameron is suffering the same. At one point, he is on a rampage and fighting Emery, and she has to stab him. Once Cameron’s fog clears, he injects himself with morphine to make himself pass out. During the final mission, to kill her father, things go just as crazy. Emery gets injured several times, as does Cameron. Reed is the one who pulls the trigger a lot of the time and ends the fighting. When the mission is done, it is Cameron who kills his commander, officially ending the Dark Forces. Emery and Cameron are now free to live back in society.

One year later, Emery and Cameron rule the underworld and are happy to be out, as well as not having anyone to answer to. Though, in an anonymous chapter, a man named Nolan reports that Mori and Morphine (Emery and Cameron’s fake names) may still be alive.